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Many people wade through their lives without goals. In many self-improvement books, goal setting is essential if you wish to succeed in any aspect of your life. I set out to improve my social life two years ago, and never looked back. But I was kind of shooting in the dark without any goals, until I decided to sit down proper and write them out.

For anyone who’s looking to improve their social lives, ask yourself this. What do you want out of it? To get to know more people? Networking? To be better at conversation? Each goal has different paths to getting there; otherwise you won’t know how to get there.

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My friends and I had a very interesting conversation today on connecting with people. At first, we hovered around the topic of generating more conversational content, so that people would feel more comfortable with maintaining a conversation. We started to do an exercise, with the purpose of taking hooks from a person’s sentence, and using that to generate content. It went something like this:

“I went to Michigan last year for a holiday.”

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Ever tried to read minds? I think we have all done it before. Not that there’s anything wrong with it, but reading minds can be detrimental to us. Especially for the shy.

I used to be really shy. I was the guy without any opinions, and if I had any, I wouldn’t voice them out. Even with my really close friends, it would take me time to open up, and I did it in bits and pieces.

I remember walking on the streets, thinking that everyone was looking at my every move. I was so self-conscious that I could never act naturally. Even when I was having a good time with my friends, I constantly read other people’s minds, seeing their perception of me. In their eyes, I was skinny and nerdy and awkward.

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